Finally Finals

So this semester blew.

I hope I can change things around, but I truly think in order to learn about yourself, you have to see what happens when you're down.

My grades suck.
I am broke.
I didn't get the promotion.
I am fat.
My haircut is looking weird since I can't afford a new one.
I am lonely.




Next semester has to be better.

And it's because I have wonderful friends.

Long Time...

Wow, so much has happened since I last wrote on this...

Worked all summer.
Capital Green.
Surviving classes.
Finding myself.


I promise to get back to writing in this more. Think maybe it will do me some good.

<3

Best Summer Ever (And It's Only The Beginning)

1. Had an amazing time in Philly.
2. Had an amazing birthday.
3. Had an amazing time with my parents.
4. Have amazing friends.
5. Going to have an amazing Memorial Day weekend.
6. Going to have an amazing time at the Coldplay concert.
7. Going to have an amazing time visiting Michelle in Chicago.
8. Going to have an amazing Welcome Week.

I love life right now. Having the time of my life.

I can't wait...

I can't wait until summer. I am more excited for this summer than the summer after graduation. Back then, I didn't think that anything could top that summer, but I have grown so much and I have found much better friends in the past year than of all high school. Don't get me wrong, I have wonderful relationships that came out of high school, but I also figured out that many of the people I thought were my friends actually used me.

I can't wait until Relay for Life '08.
I can't wait until the Capital Green concert.
I can't wait until I get to see my parents for the first time since spring break.
I can't wait until my loft gets torn down and my futon gets thrown in the garbage.
I can't wait until final exams are over
I can't wait until I get to cuddle Violet.
I can't wait until I get to sit in the audience at Walled Lake Central's Pop's Concert as an alumni.
I can't wait until I lose the Freshman Fifteen (and then some) by doing Weight Watchers.
I can't wait until I go to Philadelphia with Capital Green.
I can't wait until I get to legally go to the bar, even if it's in Canada.
I can't wait until my hair grows out.
I can't wait until I get to feel summer tingle against my skin.
I can't wait until I move into my apartment with Kim.

Summer 2008, hope you're ready for me.

And I wish my hair looked like this still.

I can feel it coming

The warm sun, the morning doves, the smell of grass, the month of April. Yes, spring has sprung, and I want to get out of here. I don't necessarily want to get out of East Lansing, but I want classes to be done with. I wish summer was a month and a half, but classes didn't start until after Labor Day. I just want to move into my own place with my own room, my own food, and doing whatever I want.

Is that so hard to ask?

What. The. Fuck?

What did I do that was so terrible it pissed off Matt Aspinal? Whatever it was, it must have made him so mad that he not only decides that I am not worthy enough to work Carrie Underwood, not only must I be punished enough to work Lil Wayne, but guard the parking lot from 7:15 AM until 2:45. Why must the parking lot be guarded for that long? And with this crowd, I feel that I am going to need a gun for my own protection if I am going to be out there protecting these stupid rappers.

Just when I was getting over the fact that I wasn't going to get to work my favorite artist's concert, I have to work this shitty one, but at 7:15 in the morning.


Just when I thought my week couldn't get worse...

Still shambles, but happier

Life is so hectic, but at least I am a happier person. I hate IAH and ISS and Anatomy and Stats. Wait, that's all my classes!

Soon ISS will be pretty much done, with the presentation being off the ground and everything. Can't wait for ICCA.

This is unorganized today, but so is my life.

My Life is in Shambles

1. Douche-bag Professor decides not to go to class, but has a totally different TA (since the class doesn't have one) teach the class.
2. He still makes this large assignment due at midnight that night. Needless to say I didn't do very well on it.
3. This assignment took me the whole day to get as far as I got, and I still wasn't finished.
4. This assignment took all enjoyment out of my Capital Green rehearsal.
5. I woke up with an infection that has caused my right index finger, a very important finger I might add, to swell and hurt a lot.
6. The pharmacist took 4 years to fill my 10.99 proscription.
7. I am not ready for my first Anatomy and Physiology exam on Wednesday.
8. My father is angry at me because I don't know how to handle my credit card.
9. I am still homesick.
10. I miss my mom, dad, brother, and cat.
11. I am starting to think that I am not cut out for college.
12. I have not read anything for my ISS class.
13. I think I have gained even more weight than I thought I possibly could.
14. I miss having my best friend be my best friend.
15. I miss my real best friend.
16. I miss being on top of things.
17. I miss being truly happy.

Looking back...

This is the beginning of a new day.
I have been given this day to use as my will.
I can waste it, or use it for good.
What I do today is important, because I am exchanging a day of my life for it.
When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever, leaving in its place something that I have traded for it.
I want it to be gain, not loss; good, not evil; success, not failure; in order that I shall not regret the price I have paid for it.
For the future is just a whole string of nows.



I thought this was said by one of (if not the most) influential person in my entire life.

Even though I did not know it very well, this saying was the closest thing I have had to true prayer.

Maybe that's because it's a positive saying that is productive in achieving a good self-image.

Even though she gave me a lot of grief, she gave me much of what is made of my self-image today, and I could never completely thank her for that.

I just think this is one of the best ways to look at life.